|Honestly, if i told friends or acquaintances that I'm feeling lonely they'd probably all laugh and say but you live at home with your parents and have a boyfriend! Then they'd mention how they should be the ones feeling the loneliest because they're living on their own with no one to love. Another complaint that i've heard before is, "Yes, I am a sex god, but it does take its toll and i'd like to settle down". I guess all of my friends and I have one thing in common, we both are lonely to some degree.|
The truth is, I am lonely. I only talk to my parents only if they ask me a question and i even have to be careful of what I say because one wrong word might lead to an endless session of nagging. Even if the question starts out with a simple, "How are you?" Then there's Bryan. What do I say about him? I guess I can start by saying that I love him. I want to love him more but I'm holding back because I know i'll get hurt in the end.
We don't see each other enough so I don't feel as confident.
This passed weekend, I watched the movie, "A Soldier's Girl". It moved me. Here's a quick synopsis on wiki
I didn't get to watch all of it because I was watching it online and the movie stopped loading. ARGH
Anyways, what i learned from this movie... Even when you're affiliated with someone queer, the affiliated person might get harassed sometimes just as bad as the queer individual.
Knowng this, I might be less open or more careful in opening myself towards others. Society can be so mean sometimes.
Any one know of any LGBQT movies?
I've seen Transamerica but that's it heh
|The following people have came out to their families and are my good friends.|
Anna and jason.
They have inspired me to do my own "coming" out but i don't have anything to "come out" with I think. like what am i going to tell my parents, "Oh hey mom and dad, i like boys and girls. No i don't have a girlfriend nor will i give up bryan and yes i'll give you grand children.
hMMM i guess i'll work on that. sorry for the caps issue, i'm just too lazy to be grammatically correct.
Update on life
Bryan's birthday was this week so we celebrated this weekend. it was ok... the birthday could have been more fantastic if there was a birthday ice cream cake involved but there wasn't poo.
Also i am now traumatized after an event that occured one morning when i went to campus. So i just got dropped off by my mom and the first thing I saw as a stepped on campus were two birds... on top of each other. I was pretty damn close to the action too. I gave them a long hard stare but they kept on it... so as i approched closer, i shouted, No stop it, that's bad! And that was the end of that :)
|Right now, i'm sitting at the school's Hayden Library. Probably this will the the first and last time I chill here since I will be graduating soon.|
I'm kind of tense about graduation because I don't know when to file for graduation. Hmm, i have to ask around heh. Also i don't know whether to go to Convocation or commencement. i SHOULD read about that too. BTW, this entry will have random CapS loCking because i'm too lazy to fix things at the moment heh.
My aspiration in life is to write, share my thoughts about the world no matter how chaotic they are. Hence, i will manually job hunt and see if i could get an internship at a local magazine place and stuff.
Do you know the feeling where when you write something on paper and when you look at the final product, you hate it and crumple and throw it away? I feel like doing that with this entry. BLEH.
I have nothing else to say except, have a great day!
|This entry comes in 4 parts.|
Part 1: I went to the Phoenix Comicon this weekend. It was fun! I purchased a Yoshi doll afterwords :)
Part 2: Still not 100% ready for school. Already lagging heh
Part 3: MMMM nutrigrain bar
Part 4: My finals for this semester will all take place on May 6th. That's right doomsday is on whatever day May 6th is on. How many finals will take place on this dreadful day you ask? Oh just 4!